I wrote the article below for a blog a couple of years back. Since I am in the wedding business, I felt it important to repost on my blog. Enjoy the read!
This past year my husband and I celebrated our 12th year anniversary. I am grateful to God for our marriage. Was it always easy? No. There were and are times when we don't see eye to eye. In a society where separation and divorce is prevalent, even in the church what is the secret to remain in unity as a family?
First, Jesus. From the very first date both my husband and I prayed for each other. It's important to first prayerfully seek a spouse. The spouse you are seeking.....do they they love the Lord?
Once your married there are definitely going to be times when you just don't understand each other. How the conflict is resolved is important. My husband and I once listened to a sermon on marriage by Todd Cook of Sagebrush Community church, that mentioned 9 "Thou shall nots"
1. Thou shall not use absolute "you always, you never".
2. Thou shall not lie to each other
Eph 5:23 when you lie you breakdown trust.
3. Thou shall fix the problem and not the blame.
4. Thou shall never raise your voice. Is what I am about to say going to benefit this person (Eph 4:29)? Speak truth in love. God never says to yell at each other or devalue each other.
5. Thou shall not interrupt.
6. Thou shall not bring up the past. Does God do that to us? Only satan throws the past in our face.
7. Though shall not go to bed angry. Even if you stay up all night resolve it.
8. Thou shall not give up. Marriage is very spiritual. God never gives up on us so why would we give up on our spouse?
9. Thou shall forgive quickly. Eph 4:31-32. God forgives instantly.
My husband and I are very open with each other. We know each other struggles and we pray out loud for each other. We also worship the Lord together in song, study God's word together and always communicate everything. We apologize to one another and never let issues just sit and rot. Everything is dealt with. I can honestly say I love our marriage and am so grateful to God for it.